Ultra-Marathoner Weight Loss System

Ignore all those fancy weight loss diets and "miracle" cures out there. You don't need to count calories, miss out on the chocolate cake or do a thousand sit ups a day. Leave Jenny alone, don't go to South Beach and never drink a single cup of Wu Long Tea; for I have the ultimate weight loss system!

With my outstanding program that has in no way been scientifically proven, FDA certified or anything else, what-so-ever, you can go from this:

To This:

Tired of being the Hippo and want to be the Gazelle? Sick of being avoided at the watering hole and want to be able to flee your enemies?
Then prepare to live the revolution! This simple program is so easy even a Three Toed Sloth could do it! It relies on the ancient wisdom of this forgotten proverb:

"Burn more than thou consumest"

I think Sophocles or some other ancient guy said it at one time or another.

Are you ready to feel the power, to feel in control of your life? Then get ready for here it comes at ya,

The Details:

Over our ten week program you will lose all the weight your body can concievably lose. You will experience tremendous pain in the form of burning quads, blistered feet and awesome amounts of exhaustion.

So get ready to get tired, because if you are like any of my other clients you'll get tired just reading this.

The Program:

Run all the freaking time. Oh yeah you heard me your gonna be running; alot. How much is alot, well your gonna be running as much as an adult male African Ostrich; that is right, an Ostrich.

If you embrace the power of the Ostrich then you too will look like the Gazelle!
Just look at one of my latest happy clients!

Thompson says "It worked for me, I used to be a sperm whale."

To take part in this legendary program just go run, right now. Start out with small mileages then begin working your way up to longer and longer runs. Before you know it you will be running ten miles every day and looking like the gazelle!